My name is... was... Robin.
I am a villain. I have become that which I used to despise. I steal from people, make illicit deals with crime overlords, and rule over what was once a relatively peaceful city with an iron fist. I have no friends, few allies, and if I should ever get caught -- IF -- I will wind up going to prison for a very long time. Do I hate what I've become?
...
No.
It began with Slade's plan to make me his apprentice. He managed to create a fake chronoton detonator -- a bomb that, when caused to explode, froze time indefinitely. My friends... the Teen Titans and I went to stop him. Back then, I was obsessed with finding Slade, knowing who he was, how he worked. I wanted to stop him once and for all.
When Cinderblock attacked us, I split from them. I took out Cinderblock, using minimal skill and effort; most of my fighting then was from sheer rage. He held a tracking device that led me straight to Slade, where we fought over the detonation device.
Only it wasn't a detonation device.
There was, as I said before, no chronoton detonator.
Instead, Slade shot all of my... all of the Teen Titans I was working with. Inside those laser blasts were nanoscopic probes, which Slade could use at any time to destroy them all. He threatened to do just that if I were ever to disobey him.
To save my friends... back when they were my friends... I became Slade's apprentice.
For a long while, we fought. He and I fought against one another as he forced me to fight against the reluctant Titans. Eventually, as I thought they would, the Titans found out about the probes and came to save me from Slade. As I suspected, he commanded me to fight them. I tried to warn them against staying.
And then, Slade pushed the button.
Immediately, the four Titans started glowing. They growled and yelled in pain. I couldn't stand it. I had two options open to me: my friends, or the machine that controlled the probes.
I sprinted toward, grabbed the machine, let it infect me.
I forced myself to crawl back to Slade. Did he want me this badly?
"New deal, Slade," I had managed to rasp. "If I lose my friends... you lose me." He glared at me, and I looked directly into his single eye.
"And I know how you hate to lose."
Slade continued to glare at me as I collapsed. For the first time in a very, very long time, I was afraid -- afraid my plan wouldn't work, that my friends would die... that I would be Slade's slave.
That fear intensified with the pain as I thought I saw the slits in Slade's -- Master Slade's -- mask become a smile.
My vision blurred for a moment as Slade deactivated the probes, seconds before we all would have died. I watched helplessly as he personally threw Raven out by her cape and literally kicked Beastboy out. Starfire and Cyborg, both stronger than average humans, managed to stand up. Cyborg aimed his powerless sonic cannon, and Starfire's hand flickered as she tried to call up a star bolt.
I could only hear the sound of Slade's punches and kicks as he thrashed them into submission, then threw them out; my vision was too blurred from held back tears.
The last thing I saw that day was Slade looking over at me, his single eye flashing with twisted humor.
"Aren't you going to thank me...?"

I was torn apart almost every day -- physically as well as mentally. Rigorous combat with Master Slade, the occasional forced fight with the Titans, and I would always either collapse from exhaustion, get myself beaten into unconsciousness, or cry myself to sleep. However, I was fighting that psychopath; as long as I was fighting him, I knew I'd be free.
At the same time, though, I had to keep fighting my... the Teen Titans. I began making excuses for myself. "They need to be kept on their toes," I said. "They need to keep their guard up in case Slade tries something more drastic."
Something about it all, though, was starting to get to me. Master Slade was right: I did like the rush, the feel of my adrenalin pumping through me in the middle of combat. It was the power I held, the skill with which I could take down even the Titans. Nothing could stand between me and what I wanted.
Nothing.
That day I started to corner the Titans, one by one, I figured it out. I had to tell them, and Master Slade couldn't know. When I told Raven, she struck out at me coldly -- she wanted me defeated, if not outright killed for my betrayal. She was foolish enough to leave so many openings. If I hadn't known her for as long as I had, I would have been able to hurt her worse than just knocking her out.
Cyborg was next, and he had been my friend for a long time -- even before his accident. He tried to talk me out of it, but... it would be the last time I showed him any mercy. As I tricked him into thinking I had chosen to return, I patted him on the back... and shut him down, walking away with...
I admit it. I walked out with a smile.
Starfire was both the hardest and easiest to reason with. I wanted her to come with me -- I still felt something for her. However, she was the brightest star among the Titans; she refused to even think of turning evil. She challenged me again, told me that if I was truly a villain now, that I would have to blast her...
She was unconscious when I left.
Beastboy was the last one I chose to deal with, but he was ready. I have to admit, he was prepared and something of a challenge with his ability to change forms. He didn't count on my entangling him in a net, but during the fight, he actually managed to not only tear off my mask, but he scarred over one eye and over my chest -- wounds I accepted from the fight while he was in lion form. Once I had him trapped, I repaid him in kind, forcing him to revert to his human form -- his skinny, frail human form.
The only reason I know that he made it back to the Tower alive, despite broken arms and legs and the inability to transform, is because I still fight him.
And I still win.

Can I say that I'm winning, though?
I no longer believe so. Every major victory I've taken from my life now has been... futile. I defeated Slade in many fights -- in his last fight. I continue my reign through Slade's rebuilt robots and even my own apprentice, a young girl named Terra that can control the earth. I have done more in a month than Slade did in about a year, taken this place for my own without an equal.
And yet, I have lost. To the Titans as much as to myself.
I still fight the Titans today, but now it's with resignation. I cannot go back, I cannot move forward. I have tried more than once to kill myself, but every time I come close -- when I manage to put the gun to my head or the blade to my wrist -- I stop myself, scared to kill myself when I'm not feeling the hunger for battle.
I fight them in the hopes that they will kill me, because I can't kill myself.

I am a villain. I am a tyrant. I am terror itself.
My name was -- can never again be -- Robin.
Now, I'm called Bloodhawk...